Dear Readers!
So far I have been fed with the stories of what Buddha, Gandhi, Julius Caesar had done to the history through out my life... I have never felt their presence in the present universe though... But i have always felt the presence of one living legend, and indeed its been a great pleasure for me to live in the same era as of that legend named "Rajni Kanth"...
"Rajnism":
The primary objective of this post is to justify the birth of a new religion called "RAJNISM"...
Just like me each one of us have come across the myths of the only cherished god of this new religion "RAJNISM"... You are right! The proposed god is none other than Rajni Kanth himself...
(After going through the collection of the myths, please read the Disclaimer carefully without fail...)
Ready???... Set... Go...
Rajni vs Proverbs:
*Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajni, there is no other way...
*Time and tide wait for no man. Except Rajni...
*When somebody say, no one is perfect; Rajni takes it as his personal insult...
*If you truly desire something from your heart, Rajni conspires to make it happen...
Rajni vs facts:
*When Rajni roars, lions pee...
*Rajni's emotional scenes can even make onions cry...
*Rajni never wet his bed as a child, The bed wet itself in fear...
*Rajni doesn't breathe air, Air hides in his lungs for protection...
*Gajni was Son of Rajni...
*Rajni's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. So no one fools Rajni on April 1st...
*Rajni puts the break in break dance...
*Rajni can answer a missed call...
*Rajni can unscramble an egg...
*1989, Rajni went to Berlin, suffered from cold, sneezed, Wall of Berlin collapsed...
*Rajni can sit in the corner of a round room...
*What came first? The chicken or the egg? Rajni only knows...
*Music listens to Rajni...
*Cancer gives you cigarettes. Rajni gives cigarettes cancer...
*When Rajni enters a room, he doesn't turn the light on, just turns the darkness off...
*Fans of Rajni are well known as AIR CONDITIONERS...
*Rajni doesn't own a microwave oven because revenge is a dish best served cold...
*Aishwariya Rai takes beauty tips from Rajni...
*Rajni once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called as giraffes...
*Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary and phrases like 'how is it', 'mind it' were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajni was born...
*Rajni never had near death experience, Death once had a near Rajni experience...
Rajni vs Science:
*Rajni doesn't move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajni...
*Rajni can beat a robot because Rajni can beat any technology...
*Evolution is a myth. We exist in this world because Rajni has allowed us to...
*Rajni is faster than the speed of sound. He will slap you Left&Right together and you think its only one slap...
*Rajni doesn't hit the iron when it's hot, instead he hits the iron continuously & makes it hot & moulds it the way he wants...
*Sir Isaac Newton published law of gravity after taking approval from Rajni...
*The law of gravity existed until Rajni was born, Now he can throw any object out of this galaxy without any force...
*Rajni can turn a piece of coal into a diamond: By squeezing it in his hand...
*Rajni can spot a micro-organism from tens of 1000s of kms away, & incinerate it with his naked gaze...
*The launchpad of first successful ISRO (Indian) Rocket was nail of Rajni's left hand's fourth finger and it did not use any fuel...
Rajni vs Sports:
*Rajni once won a "Formula One" race on his bicycle...
*Rajni once got into a knife fight. The knife lost...
*When Rajni plays cricket he doesn't hit the ball for a six. He hits it for a century...
*Rajni can checkmate Vishwanathan Anand with his very first move...
*Rajni once won all four tennis grand-slams with a single serve...
*USA dropped third Atom Bomb on OSAKA, but Rajni caught it and threw it back to Moon...
*Michael Schumacher and Narain Karthikeyan once challenged Rajni in an Formula One race. Rajni won in reverse gear...
*Once Rajni won a football world cup finals for India in a penalty shoot out, He managed to score six goals in a single kick...
*When Rajni does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down...
Rajni vs Time:
*Rajni doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is...
*Rajni is so fast he always comes yesterday...
*Rajni never does Time Pass, time itself pass in his respect...
*Rajni got his driver's license at the age of 18 seconds...
*Rajni is so fast, he can run around the world and tap himself on the shoulder...
Rajni vs Google:
*Rajni's email address is gmail@rajnikanth.com
*When Rajni hits you even Google won't be able to find you...
*Even if Google fails to find you, Rajni will...
Rajni vs Opponent:
*In an average living room there are 1,000,000,000 objects Rajni could use to kill you, including the room itself...
*When Rajni is asked to kill someone he doesn't know, he pulls the trigger and tells the bullet to go & find the target...
*Rajni can kill you by slapping you in your dream...
*Rajni will slap you in dream and you will be paralyzed in reality...
Rajni vs Geography:
*There is no such thing as Global Warming...Rajni was feeling cold, so he brought the Sun closer...
*Rajni stopped breathing to control global warming... He's anyways immortal...
*Rajni can move mountains. Himalayas used to be in Antarctica till he wanted for meditating in India...
*When Rajni stares at the sun, it hides behind the clouds & it rains...
*Rajni has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there...
*Rajni does do headstands. He carries the Earth on his head...
*Rajni can moonwalk on the sun...
*Actually Moon revolves around Rajni not earth since Rajni lives on Earth...
*It wasn't a Tsunami in '2004, indeed it was just a desperate giant wave trying to touch Rajni's feet & seek his blessings...
*Rajni was cruising on Indian ocean and he sneezed, it caused Tsunami...
*It has been proven that, universe is expanding,but actually it is trying to move far from Rajni...
Rajni vs Maths:
*Rajni can divide 22/7 to a whole number...
*Rajni has counted to infinity - thrice, while he was just doing his LKG...
*Rajni can divide by zero and add zero to zero to make a billion...
*Rajni can factorize a prime number, in more than one way...
Rajni vs Economy:
*When Rajni Plays Monopoly, it affects the actual World Economy...
*Rajni can dare to think beyond IIPM...
*Once Rajni was watching TV. He commanded the show to pause right there. Thus, TataSky+ was born...
Rajni vs Hollywood movies:
*Super-Man, Bat-Man, Spider-Man, Shakti-Man, Iron-man, Hulk took training from Rajni...
*Rajni's titanic version: climax scene,Rajni came alive on sea shore with actress Kate Winslet in one hand & titanic in other hand...
*Neo (Matrix) stops bullets by himself. But seeing Rajni, bullets stop themselves...
MAY RAJNI BLESS YOU!!!....:):):)
Disclaimer:
*I just love Rajni Kanth as much as every human being of India does so...
*My intention is not to hurt any Rajni follower as i am also one of his die hard followers... Please consider this post as a pre-publicity for Endhiran (The Robot) and let me live in peace even if you find any unparliamentary words...
*The Rajni myths are carefully collected from different sources including my friends across India, my friends' tweets, and various articles... And of course i have also added some new myths...
*My major job in this post is just to categorize and add some spices to the menu...
*And i hope that every reader will agree that the menu, thus prepared so, contains 0% trans fat... So please don't take it to your heart... Instead take it to your brain (if you have one) and just laugh it off (if you can)...
LONG LIVE RAJNI!!!
